We all have our reasons why we do something and why we don’t do something, but do we have a reason to search for a reason?
It is a rather interesting question.
I give this example that happened just today.
We are waiting at a stop light, traffic is bad, there is a man, he has a sign that says he is hungry.
We only have $5 between us in cash, just a $5 and that is it. We don’t usually give more than $2 dollars, but there was something in the actions of the man and in the eyes, you could tell he was hungry.
The traffic is still bad, we haven’t moved, we talked to each other and it is decided that the best use of this $5 right then and there, was to give it to the guy. The reason – we had food at home, he didn’t. We had a home, he had a backpack and it was in that moment – we knew….
This isn’t the happily ever after story – this is the part of the story where it gets weird.
We roll down the window and call the man over in a friendly manner, with the $5 in hand to give to him.
We smile, we say this is all we have, hope it helps, the man asks if we are Christians- puzzled by the question, we reply no but here is some money to help with that hunger, the man asks if we are Jewish, mmm no – we are not religious is our reply – the man starts to rant at us that he has given all his worldly possessions away to follow Christ – our reply is okay – awkward pause – the man continues to tell us that he has been robbed, molested and a few other things in his journey across the country…another awkward silence… then the rant goes to the gold standard and the Nixon era… awkward is an understatement at this point.
Finally I ask – do you want the money or not?
The man says “no” and a few other things with regards to us needing to find Christ and walks off.
The window is back up, the a/c is on and we are still in traffic, this time stunned into the awkwardness of what just happened. The worst part is that isn’t even the strangest encounter that both of us have had.
Then we continue with traffic, trying to find the reason that just happened.
The reason.
Mental health, homeless, poverty, drugs.
We sought a reason for the strange behavior, the rant and the hat.
We wanted to explain it away, but there is no logical answer to it.
I will never know why that guy had a sign saying he was hungry but didn’t accept my monetary donation for food. I don’t see the reason, and after thinking hard about it, I don’t need a reason either.
He didn’t know my reason to give, I don’t know his reason to refuse.
See, my reason to give is equally as valuable as his reason to refuse.
It doesn’t matter if I am Jewish, Black, Christian, Hispanic, Muslim, Woman, White, Man, alien, something else, all of it, or none of it. What matters is that I didn’t turn the search for the reason into an excuse not to try again to help someone else or to justify this man’s actions.
Everybody has the right to refuse accepting help whether poor or rich or in-between.
Everybody has the privilege to give what they wish whether poor or rich or in-between.
It took me several hours to stop looking for a reason in this guy’s actions, and start thinking -I hope finds what he is looking for- and let it go. Moving on the next thing in life….
We all have our reasons, our beliefs, our thoughts, our hopes and even our excuses.
I leave you with this –
“For every action there is an equal and opposite re-action.” Newton’s Third Law on Motion.
AND the lyrics from an old Buddy Guy song….
I sat my little child down
when he was old enough to know
I said I fell in this big wide world
You’re gonna meet all kinds of folks
I said son it all comes down to just one simple rule
That you treat everybody just the way
You want them to treat you
Yeah
Skin Deep Skin Deep
Underneath we’re all the same
Skin Deep
Skin Deep
Underneath we’re all the same
We’re all of the same
Moving Difference 